When Guilt Becomes Heavy

Over the last few days, we spoke about anger and sadness. Another emotion that many of us quietly carry is guilt.

Guilt can show up in so many different ways. Sometimes it’s linked to what’s happening in the world. You scroll through heartbreaking images and videos and suddenly feel bad for every small joy in your life. You find yourself feeling guilty for smiling. For eating a good meal. For resting when others cannot.

But guilt doesn’t only come from that. It can come from your past mistakes. From the way you reacted to someone you love. From missing prayers. From not being the daughter, sister, wife or mother you wanted to be.

Sometimes guilt creeps in after setting boundaries. When you finally say no. When you put yourself first for once. When you choose rest over pleasing others.

You wonder… Am I being selfish? Am I doing enough? Am I a bad person for feeling this way?

The thing about guilt is that it often comes from a good place. It comes from having a conscience. From caring. From wanting to do better. From wanting to be good in the sight of Allah and good to others.

But guilt is like a visitor. It comes to show you something. To highlight what needs reflection or change. But it was never meant to unpack and stay.

When guilt stays too long, it turns to shame. It makes you feel stuck. It convinces you that you’re not worthy. That no matter what you do, it will never be enough.

And that is not the voice of growth. That is the voice that holds you back.

In Islam, we are taught to feel regret for our mistakes but then turn to Allah with hope. To make sincere tawbah. To do better. But not to live in permanent self-punishment. Allah is Al Ghaffar. The Most Forgiving. The One who loves to pardon.

When your guilt is about people, let it guide you to make things right. Apologise if needed. Fix what you can. But don’t let it eat away at your worth.

When your guilt is about the world, let it push you to make du‘ā, to give, to speak up, to care. But don’t let it rob you of the joys Allah has given you.

When your guilt is about your own healing and boundaries, remind yourself that taking care of yourself is part of being able to show up for others.

Guilt is a teacher. It is not meant to chain you. Listen to it. Learn from it. Then let it go.

You are allowed to move forward. You are allowed to feel joy again. You are allowed to forgive yourself.

And remember, Allah sees your heart. He knows your intentions. He knows how much you care.

May He soften what feels heavy. May He guide us to what is right. And may He fill our hearts with peace and acceptance. Ameen.

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You sit on your bed. You eat your meals. You scroll. You laugh with your family. You plan your day. But in the back of your mind there’s a heaviness. A whisper that says, “How can I live like this when others are suffering?”

You see videos that break your heart. Stories that make you cry. Images you can’t unsee. And you wonder… Am I doing enough? Am I selfish? Am I failing them?

This is a pain so many of us are carrying right now. Watching the news about Palestine. About Iran. About war. About injustice. About families who have lost everything.

And here we are, in warm homes. With food. With safety.

But here is something I want to remind you of, feeling guilt is not a punishment. It is a sign that your heart is alive. It means you care. It means you are connected. It means you haven’t turned away from your ummah.

But you also cannot let guilt drown you. Because when guilt turns to hopelessness, it stops you from doing good. It makes you freeze. It makes you feel like nothing you do matters.

And that is exactly what shaytaan wants.

So instead of letting the guilt eat at you, let it move you.

Make du‘ā for them with sincerity. Give whatever you can in charity, even if it feels small. Raise awareness in the ways you are able. Share posts. Talk to Allah in the middle of the night and cry for them. Use your tongue. Use your hands. Use your heart. But also don’t let it consume you because it’s also not your burden to carry. Do what you can and leave the rest to Allah. Surrender, let go and trust Him.

And when you smile at your family or enjoy a simple meal, don’t feel guilty. Feel grateful. And let that gratitude push you to do more for those who don’t have what you have right now.

We are not helpless. Every du‘ā counts. Every tear counts. Every little action counts.

And Allah knows your heart. He knows how much you care.

May Allah accept from us. May He ease their pain. May He grant them victory. May He allow us to be part of their healing in this world and the next. Ameen.