Why We Feel Guilty Asking Allah — And How to Change That

Have you ever noticed how difficult it can feel to ask Allah for what you really want?

Not the general du’ā.

Not the safe requests.

But the deep ones. The specific ones. The ones that matter to you.

Sometimes we feel shy.

Sometimes we feel guilty.

Sometimes we feel unworthy.

Sometimes we feel undeserving.

Sometimes we feel like we are asking for too much.

And often, the reason is not that Allah is distant.

It is that we have not yet built intimacy with Him.

Think about it in human terms.

You would never feel comfortable asking a stranger for something personal. You would hesitate even with an acquaintance. Even with a friend or family member that you are not very close to, you might hold back. You might overthink. You might minimise what you need.

But with someone you are deeply close to, someone you trust, someone you have built a strong and intimate bond with, you ask freely. You are honest. You say what you need. You say what you want. You do not rehearse it ten times in your head.

Why?

Because there is safety.

There is familiarity.

There is relationship.

The same applies to Allah.

When we have not yet built that bond, asking can feel heavy. Turning to Him can feel unnatural. We may still believe in Him. We may still pray. We may still make du’ā. But the closeness is not yet there.

So the guilt creeps in.

Who am I to ask?

Why would He give this to me?

Maybe I should not want this.

Maybe I am being selfish.

But when intimacy grows, guilt decreases.

When you speak to Allah daily, when you share your small thoughts, your random worries, your tiny joys, your frustrations and your fears, something begins to change.

You start recognising Him.

You start noticing His responses.

You start seeing His gentleness.

And slowly, your heart relaxes.

This is where the Conversations with Allah come in.

This challenge is not just about speaking. It is about building relationship.

At first, it may feel uncomfortable. You may struggle for words. You may feel awkward. You may not know what to say. That is normal.

But you keep showing up.

You keep talking.

You keep pushing through that initial resistance.

You speak to Him as you would speak to someone you are trying to grow close to. You share the small things. You mention the big things. You acknowledge Him in everyday moments.

And over time, the distance shrinks.

You begin to feel that He is near.

You begin to trust that He is listening.

You begin to believe that He cares.

And when that bond strengthens, asking becomes natural.

You will ask Him for guidance.

You will ask Him for companionship.

You will ask Him for healing.

You will ask Him for the basic things you want and even the luxury things you desire.

You will ask Him for things you once felt shy to even admit you wanted.

Not because you are demanding.

But because you are connected.

When there is relationship, there is comfort.

When there is comfort, there is vulnerability.

And when there is vulnerability, there is ease in asking.

Many sisters struggle to turn to Allah not because they do not love Him, but because they have not yet experienced Him as close.

This is what we are building here.

A bond.

A familiarity.

A daily connection.

So that Allah becomes your first port of call. Not your last option. Not the One you turn to only when everything else fails. But the One you speak to before anyone else.

And when that happens, you will no longer feel guilty to ask.

You will feel safe.

May Allah allow us to build that intimacy with Him. May He make us comfortable in turning to Him for everything, big and small, and may He allow our hearts to feel how near He truly is.