True Strength: Choosing Peace Over People’s Opinions

True strength is not measured by how much we can endure physically or by how many arguments we can win. It is found in the quiet ability to let go of what does not concern us, to choose peace over people’s opinions, and to focus on our own hearts and lives rather than getting caught up in the lives of others.

Many of us spend so much time worrying about what people think. We overthink what someone might say about the way we dress, the choices we make, or how we raise our children. Sometimes we hold back from doing something good out of fear of criticism. Other times, we become so caught up in watching what others are doing that we forget to tend to our own growth. We judge their choices, talk about their lives, and even find ourselves trying to figure out things about them, piecing together their actions or stories, even though it does not concern us in any way.

Think about how often this shows up in our daily lives. Scrolling through social media and wondering why someone travels so much or how they can afford certain things. Hearing about a relative’s decision and talking about it for hours with others. Noticing a sister change the way she dresses or spends her time and immediately trying to work out why. These thoughts and conversations may feel small, but they take root in our hearts, adding heaviness, comparison, and distraction.

Every moment we spend focused on someone else’s life is a moment we could have spent reflecting on our own state, improving our relationship with Allah, or bringing peace into our homes and hearts. It does not add any benefit to us, and it often leaves us with restlessness and negativity.

Strength is not in being everywhere or knowing everything about everyone. Strength is in turning away from matters that do not benefit us, protecting our tongues from gossip, and guarding our hearts from curiosity that leads us away from peace. It is in remembering that what others do is between them and Allah, and that our energy is better spent working on our own connection with Him.

Imagine how light we would feel if we stopped carrying the burden of people’s words. If we no longer feared their judgement or sought their approval. Imagine if we let go of the need to understand or comment on every decision others make, and instead used that time to nurture our relationship with Allah. Life would feel calmer, our hearts would soften, and our minds would find rest.

For example, think of a time when someone criticised you unfairly. Did it change what Allah had written for you? Did their words alter your provision or your destiny? Or think of a moment when you spent hours worrying about someone else’s choices, only to realise later that it did nothing but leave you drained. These moments remind us that people’s opinions, whether good or bad, do not control our lives. Only Allah does.

True strength is when we stop comparing, stop overthinking people’s thoughts, and stop trying to figure out every detail about others. It is when we choose to carry only what truly matters: our faith, our purpose, and our peace.

The next time you catch yourself overthinking what someone has said, worrying about how you are perceived, or discussing someone else’s life, pause and ask yourself: will this bring me closer to Allah? Will this add to my peace or take away from it?

Let your heart rest in the certainty that your worth, your provision, and your destiny are with Allah alone. When that becomes your focus, people’s voices grow quieter, your burdens feel lighter, and your life feels far more peaceful.